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Directors

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M    I    N    U    T    E    S

Of

Liberation Kilt Company

Board of Directors Meeting

January 3rd 2017

Called for the purpose of figuring out what the hell to do next.

DISCLAIMER: TEXT IN ‘ALL CAPS’ DESCRIBES REAL NAMES, PLACES, PLANS, IDEAS AND EVENTS. EVERYTHING ELSE (BOARD MEETING, CHARACTERS, PLACES AND EVENTS) ARE FIGMENTS OF THE AUTHOR’S IMAGINATION OR MADE UP FROM RANDOMLY SOURCED DATA USED IN A FICTITIOUS MANNER.

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Secret Cabinet War Room

Edinburgh, Scotland

 

Present: Sir Loftus McLeod of Skye (Chair); Capt. James MacDuff (Vice-Chair); The Hon. Angus Haldane, Esq. (Secretary); Mabel MacSween (Treasurer); George Yuill (Master Distiller); Kirstie Gail-Howling (Prof Emeritus); Declan Abercromby (Regimental Outfitter); Charles Skene, QC (Commissioner of Oaths); Mackenzie MacKenzie (Anthropologist); William Delavoye (Quartermaster); Rod MacAskill (Pamphleteer); James Farquharson (Chief Cook & Bottle Washer)

Absent: Myrtle McNair, James Macnab & Declan Kedgeree (dispatched to St. James’ Palace to perform New Year Pipe & Drum Ceremony), Major John de Forbes & Robert of Lochsley (bivouacked on Isle of Skye)

 

Sir Loftus called the meeting to order and toasted the New Year. Skene administered the oaths of allegiance to Liberation Kilt Co. and its campaign against 21st century injustices.

 

Achievements of 2016

Sir Loftus reported the year’s milestones:

(1) SUCCESSFUL LAUNCH OF THE ‘REBEL TARTAN PROJECT AT THE UNIVERSITY OF BRIGHTON AND NOTTINGHAM TRENT UNIVERSITY, UK. THIS IS A JOINT COLLABORATION BUTE FABRICS OF SCOTLAND (OUR WEAVERS) AND THE ETHICAL FASHION FORUM, LONDON. FOURTEEN TEAMS OF STUDENTS PARTICIPATED, EACH CHARGED WITH DESIGNING WOVEN, KNITTED AND PRINTED TEXTILES ON THE THEME OF HUMAN TRAFFICKING. WINNERS RECEIVED 1-YEAR COMPLIMENTARY MEMBERSHIP OF THE ETHICAL FASHION FORUM. ONE LUCKY STUDENT WON A WORK PLACEMENT AT BUTE FABRICS.

(2) BENEFIT CORPORATION STATUS. LIBERATION KILT CO. IS NOW A PUBLIC BENEFIT CORPORATION, A NEW KIND OF FOR-PROFIT ENTITY AUTHORISED TO HAVE A POSITIVE IMPACT ON SOCIETY, WORKERS, THE COMMUNITY AND THE ENVIRONMENT IN ADDITION TO PROFIT AS ITS LEGALLY DEFINED GOALS. TWENTY PER CENT OF NET PROFITS GO TO NON-PROFIT ORGANISATIONS WORKING FOR THE SAME CAUSES. BENEFIT CORPORATION STATUS BRINGS OUR LEGAL STRUCTURE INTO FULL ALIGNMENT WITH OUR MISSION.

(3) SUPPLY PARTNERSHIP WITH LULU & ROBBIE, A NEW UK BRAND OF NATURAL PET CLOTHING. ADVISED BY PRACTISING VETERINARIANS, LULU & ROBBIE HAS DESIGNED AN EXCITING RANGE OF PREMIUM JACKETS FOR DOGS, LAUNCHING THIS MONTH. THE COLLECTION INCLUDES JACKETS MADE FROM OUR UNITED NATIONS ENDORSED ‘BLUEHEART’ TARTAN AGAINST HUMAN TRAFFICKING.

(4) CLIMATE CHANGE PRINT COLLECTION. WE HAVE DESIGNED SIX PRINTS ON THE THEME OF CLIMATE CHANGE, TO BE REGISTERED WITH THE UK INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY OFFICE IN DUE COURSE. WE CONSULTED JOEL & SON (A REPUTABLE TEXTILE MERCHANT WITH A ROYAL WARRANT) AND THEY RECOMMENDED DIGITAL PRINTING, WHICH YIELDS THE HIGHEST QUALITY, COLOUR-FAST RESULT. DIGITAL PRINTING ALSO HAS A MUCH LOWER ENVIRONMENTAL FOOTPRINT THAN CONVENTIONAL METHODS.

(5) LIBERATION KILT COLLECTION. WORKING WITH AN OUTSTANDING LEATHER CRAFTSMAN AND A BLACKSMITH, WE HAVE DESIGNED A CONTEMPORARY SPORRAN TO BE WORN WITH OUR KILT (SUPPLIED BY THE SAME SCOTTISH FIRM THAT SUPPLIES THE MINISTRY OF DEFENCE) AND A SUBMARINER-INSPIRED SWEATER (WITH VARIOUS TONGUE-IN-CHEEK CAPTIONS). WE AIM TO LAUNCH THE LIBERATION KILT COLLECTION IN THE AUTUMN.

(6) Championship Win. Private Sealy was awarded first place in the Regimental Middleweight Boxing Championship, a first for L.K.C., beating opponents from nine other companies. The first round of the final match was merely sparring, each waiting for the other to lead off. Then in the second round Sealy suddenly awoke and landed his opponent several blows in rapid succession, polishing him off in round 3. He also won the wrestling on horseback competition.

Discussion

Capt. MacDuff proposed a toast to the exemplary men and women who made these fine achievements possible. EACH WILL RECEIVE A CERTIFICATE OF SPECIAL MERIT IN RECOGNITION OF THEIR SERVICE.

William Delavoye asked what’s in store for the Rebel Tartan Project. Sir Loftus replied that ACCORDING TO JULIANA SISSONS, FASHION DESIGNER-IN-RESIDENCE AT THE V&A MUSEUM AND ADVISOR TO L.K.C., THE UNIVERSITY OF BRIGHTON WILL PARTICIPATE THIS SPRING, ALONG WITH MANCHESTER SCHOOL OF ART. MacSween reminded all present of our vision for this project: TO INSPIRE AND RECRUIT THE BEST OF THE NEXT GENERATION OF DESIGNERS BEFORE THEY GET SUCKED INTO SOME MEGABRAND’S ORBIT. Delavoye made a toast to the designers of the future.

Angus Haldane reiterated that L.K.C.’s PUBLIC BENEFIT EXTENDS FAR BEYOND CHARITABLE CONTRIBUTIONS TO INCLUDE RAISING AWARENESS AND RALLYING PEOPLE TO SUPPORT WORTHY CAUSES. OUR TEXTILES FUNCTION AS A KIND OF SOCIAL MEDIA, STRENGTHENING SOCIAL BONDS AND CONNECTING LIKE-MINDED STRANGERS WHO MIGHT OTHERWISE NEVER CROSS PATHS.

Declan Abercromby asked how the supply partnership with Lulu & Robbie might evolve down the road. Sir Loftus replied that LULU & ROBBIE HAS EXPRESSED INTEREST IN SEVERAL OTHER TARTANS IN OUR COLLECTION. MOREVER WE EXPECT THAT WITH THE AID OF MEDIA COVERAGE, OTHER FIRMS IN A RANGE OF INDUSTRIES WILL TAKE INTEREST AND FOLLOW SUIT. REVENUES GENERATED FROM THIS COMMERCIAL ACTIVITY WILL BE REINVESTED TO BRING OUR PRINT AND KILT COLLECTIONS TO FRUITION.

New Business

Call for Dress Regulation Handbook

Abercrombie moved for a dress regulation handbook to ensure all personnel set the highest standards of turnout and bearing when in uniform, pointing out that four board members had arrived in No. 13A Barrack Dress, which is completely inappropriate for the occasion. MacSween seconded the motion, which carried unanimously.

 

Retirement of Sergeant-Major Combs

William Delavoye announced the retirement of Sergeant-Major Combs after 31 years’ service. He enlisted at 16 years old, serving successively through all ranks until he became sergeant major, an appointment he held for 13 years. He was awarded a certificate from the School of Musketry in Hythe, and a medal for long service and good conduct. We are delighted to report that he will maintain his connection with L.K.C., serving as Editor of our forthcoming pamphlet. Delavoye moved for a grand dinner in his honour. Sir Loftus seconded and the motion carried.

 

Spring Recruitment Drive

Mabel MacSween presented a poster for the upcoming recruitment drive and moved for its approval. George Yuill seconded. Charles Skene asked for the selection criteria. MacSween said would-be recruits need only demonstrate (1) a commitment to our mission, (2) an empirical mindset, and (3) a sense of humour. The motion carried unanimously.

 

Treasurer’s Report

MacSween reported that our war chest is still not yet big enough to take on the megabrands. However her presentation was cut short by a hydraulic fracking-induced earthquake.

Sir Loftus declared the meeting adjourned. All made for the exit.

 

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M I N U T E S

Of

Board of Directors Meeting

January 1st 2016

Called for the purpose of figuring out what the hell to do next.

DISCLAIMER: TEXT IN ‘ALL CAPS’ DESCRIBES REAL NAMES, PLACES, PLANS, IDEAS AND EVENTS. EVERYTHING ELSE (BOARD MEETING, CHARACTERS, PLACES AND EVENTS) ARE FIGMENTS OF THE AUTHOR’S IMAGINATION OR MADE UP FROM RANDOMLY SOURCED DATA USED IN A FICTITIOUS MANNER.

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Secret Cabinet War Room

Edinburgh, Scotland

Present: Sir Loftus MacLeod of Skye (Chair); Capt. James MacDuff (Vice-Chair); The Hon. Angus Haldane, Esq. (Secretary); Mabel MacSween (Treasurer); Rod MacAskill (Pamphleteer); George Yuill (Master Distiller); Myrtle McNair (Piper); James Macnab (Drummer); Hamish de Beauvoir (Attaché); Kirstie Gail-Howling (Professor Emeritus); Declan Abercromby (Regimental Outfitter); Charles Skene, QC, Commissioner of Oaths; Mackenzie MacKenzie (Anthropologist); Declan Abercromby (Regimental Outfitter).

Absent: James Farquharson (whereabouts unknown); William Delavoye (ditto); Major John de Forbes (majorly hung-over); Declan Kedgeree (on manoeuvres); Robert of Lochsley (lunch with foreign secretary).

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Sir Loftus called the meeting to order and toasted in the New Year. Skene administered the oaths of allegiance to Liberation Kilt Company and its campaign against 21st century injustices.

Motion to Move New Year Meeting

Capt. MacDuff reported two members missing and a third (Major John de Forbes) found shackled to Buckingham Palace railings at 3am this morning. He moved the board push back the New Year meeting by 72 hours to permit a full recovery from the Hogmanay celebrations. MacSween seconded the motion, which passed unanimously.

Achievements and Setbacks in 2015

Sir Loftus reported THE THREE MAIN ACHIEVEMENTS OF 2015: (1) SUPPLY AGREEMENT WITH BUTE FABRICS LTD. OF SCOTLAND, FOUNDED BY 7TH MARQUESS OF BUTE IN 1947, (2) OFFICIAL REGISTRATION OF UNITED NATIONS ENDORSED ‘BLUEHEART’ TARTAN, AND (3) GREEN LIGHT FOR THE ‘REBEL TARTAN PROJECT’ AT BRIGHTON AND NOTTINGHAM TRENT UNIVERSITIES COMMENCING SPRING 2016.

Despite a gallant effort, Hamish de Beauvoir failed to find sympathy among our parliamentary allies for a bill mandating the wearing of Highland dress across the United Kingdom. Capt. MacDuff made a toast and wished de Beauvoir jolly good luck on tour with the French Foreign Legion.

Sir Loftus reported damages and losses associated with the recent supply depot break-in in excess of fifteen thousand pounds, including bagpipes that led the 73rd Regiment to victory at Port Novo in 1781, and a bottle of rare 1969 vintage Macallan Scotch whisky with crystal decanter and matching glasses. He called for an immediate and full investigation of the heist. McNair made a motion to approve the report and the investigation, seconded by MacAskill.

Discussion

Macnab asked what kinds of fabrics Bute is weaving for LKC. Baillie replied that BUTE FABRICS WEAVES IN WORSTED WOOL (THE FIRST BOLT OF BLUEHEART TARTAN WILL BE TAKEN FROM THE LOOM END OF JANUARY) BUT PLANS TO DIVERSIFY INTO SOFTER FABRICS, INCLUDING MERINO WOOL, LAMBS WOOL, CASHMERE, AND ALPACA.  Macnab made a toast to the weavers.

MacSween asked what might result from the Rebel Tartan Project. Baillie said THE VISION OF JULIANA SISSONS, FASHION DESIGNER-IN-RESIDENCE AT THE V&A AND ADVISER TO LKC, IS TO EXTEND THE PROJECT BEYOND THE PILOT UNIVERSITIES TO OTHER TEXTILE AND FASHION DESIGN SCHOOLS IN THE UK, USA AND BEYOND. THE GOAL IS TO INSPIRE AND RECRUIT THE BEST EMERGING DESIGNERS BEFORE SOME MEGABRAND SUCKS THEM INTO ITS ORBIT. MacSween made a toast to the designers of the future. Capt. MacDuff followed with a toast to the overthrow of the megabrands.

Strategic Outlook

Abercromby unveiled some NEW AND EXCITING TARTAN DESIGNS, ALONG WITH A PLAN FOR A CAREFULLY GRADED CASCADE OF COLLECTIONS, EACH DESIGNED TO WORK ON ITS OWN TERMS YET ALSO FEEL PART OF A COHERENT WHOLE. EACH SHOULD ALLOW A RANGE OF WEARERS, FROM THE CAUTIOUS TO THE ECCENTRIC, TO FEEL IT HAS SOMETHING TO OFFER THEM. TARTAN WILL THUS BE USED IN THREE DIFFERENT WAYS: (1) OVERTLY E.G. ALL-TARTAN KILTS, TREWS, SCARVES; (2) COVERTLY I.E. TARTAN LININGS FOR WAISTCOATS, JACKETS AND COATS KNOWN ONLY THE WEARER; AND (3) AS DETAILS E.G. BUTTONS, LAPELS, SHOE QUARTERS, ETC. Macnab made a motion to approve the plan, seconded by MacKenzie.

Discussion

The Hon. Haldane asked what had inspired this approach. Abercromby said it was a variety of sources, including THE BOOK HELLO MY NAME IS PAUL SMITH, PURCHASED AT THE PAUL SMITH STORE AT HEATHROW. The Hon. Haldane objected on the grounds that Mr. Smith is not a Highland outfitter and doesn’t wear a kilt, however he was overruled.

“Never lose sight of our ultimate goal”, said Sir Loftus. OUR TARTANS ARE JUST TEXTILES AND YET THEY’RE ALSO AN INVITATION TO SEEK OUT AND ENGAGE WITH LIKE-MINDED OTHERS WITH RENEWED VIGOR AND SPONTANEITY, WHETHER ON THE TUBE OR ACROSS THE DINNER TABLE. FROM FREEDOM OF SPEECH TO HUMAN TRAFFICKING, THE ISSUES ARE FAR TOO IMPORTANT TO LEAVE TO THE POWERS THAT BE!

Tartan prints

Yuill asked whether it would be possible to print the tartans, say on a flask, phone case, or Land Rover. Abercromby said that PRINTING WOULD PERMIT ALL KINDS OF INTERIORS, CLOTHING AND ACCESSORIES APPLICATIONS. USING DIGITAL TECHNOLOGY WE CAN ADD SPECIAL EFFECTS, SUCH AS FADED EDGES OR MORE VIBRANT COLOURS.

Prof Howling reported that LKC IS WORKING ON A RANGE OF TARTAN PRINTS INSPIRED BY ARTIST JUDY WATSON, WHO SUPERIMPOSED SCIENTIFIC CLIMATE DATA ON PAINTINGS OF FOUND NATURAL OBJECTS. A SIMILAR EFFECT MIGHT BE ACHIEVED BY SUPERIMPOSING ONTO THE KEELING TARTAN SYMBOLS OF THE ENERGY REVOLUTION (WIND TURBINES, ETC). Yuill made a toast to unbridled creativity in 2016.

Partnerships

Yuill emphasized THE IMPORTANCE OF FORGING ALLIANCES WITH LIKE-MINDED TAILORS, DESIGNERS AND LABELS, AS WELL AS SPECIALTY SUPPLIERS OF ARTISAN GOODS (SHOES, GLOVES, BAGS, RUGS, ETC). DISTRIBUTION WILL BE ONLINE AND EVENTUALLY AT DEDICATED LIBERATION KILT COMPANY STORES, WHICH MAY INCLUDE BESPOKE TAILORING, A WORKING LOOM, AND EVENTS SUCH AS READINGS AND WORKSHOPS.

Treasurer’s Report

MacSween was to update the board on the effort to amass a war chest large enough to take on the megabrands, however her presentation was cut short by a flood-induced power failure, followed by sirens.

Sir Loftus declared the meeting adjourned. All made for the exit.

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